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5 Sure Fire Ways To Teach Your Child To Have A-Plus Manners

As a parent myself, I want the best for my child.  I want her to be happy, healthy and have all her dreams become reality. 

As a martial arts school owner I also want that for all my students.  Of the many things we teach in our Danbury CT area martial arts school, the character skill for this coming month is one of my very favorites.

One of the foundational skills, that is just so important in life, is manners.  The simple ability to say things like ‘Thank you, please, excuse me, I’m sorry’, is often times, sadly lacking in society today.

This skill requires and builds upon many other character skills.  Empathy, the ability to put oneself in other people’s shoes, needs to exist in order to nurture manners.  People must learn the character trait self control and respect to build manners.

How many times per day do you find yourself thinking about someone ‘How rude’?  Lack of manners seems to becoming the norm these days.

We live in a technological and fast paced world where we are becoming increasingly disconnected, pardon the pun, from the very society in which we live.  Face to face contact is becoming a thing of the past as text messaging becomes our basic mechanism of communication. 

We have to be especially careful to teach these fundamentally human character traits so as literally not to evolve into some kind of mechanical information aged artificial life form.  I think I am starting to sound like my parents.

Here are 5 sure fire ways to teach your child to develop those old fashioned manners. They really never do go out of style.  Just out of practice.

1:  Setup a communication standard.  This is simply how you expect your child to address people.

At my martial arts school, we have a built in method for teaching manners. It all begins with our communication standard. 

All students immediately understand how they are to address instructors by Mr. or Mrs. Last name.  They also answer all questions by saying yes or no sir or ma’am.

At home, how do your children speak to your friends, relatives, strangers?  How do they speak to you?  Try having them address all people by last name.  Explain why this is good manners.

2:  Create a phone script.  Allow your child to answer the phone.  Kids love to be able to do this.  Makes them feel like a grown up.

Plot out a script of what they must say.  Here’s an example:

“Hello this is Hannah, who may I say is calling please?”

What happens next could be “My parents are currently busy may I take a number where they can call you back?” or “Please hold while I get my parents.”

Role play this and make sure they have it down before you let them get started.  Learning by doing is much more powerful than just being told to do it.

3:  Make a manners log.  This is a log where each day everyone in the family writes down what they did to show good manners today.

We call ours the ‘Random Acts of Manners’ list.  It turns into a fun game the entire family participates in. 

Set a goal and turn it into a contest for getting to a certain amount of good manners logged in for the end of the week or month.  If the goal gets hit, maybe the family does a movie night or goes to the kids favorite restaurant. 

Kids love challenges.  There doesn’t even need to be a prize.  Just the idea that there is a goal to hit will have your kids looking for opportunities to show good manners.

4:  Do stuff together.  The more time we spend with our kids, the bigger influence we’ll have on them.

Look for things they do that show good manners and point it out.  Be a good finder and help them to be one too!

When they do something showing bad manners, ask them how they can show better manners. 

As we teach this in the martial arts school through our character education program called Powerful Words, we explain, expect but don’t lecture.  We explain our expectations and then allow them to rise to the occasion.

5: Be the change in the world you want to see.  This is the hardest part by all means. 

This simply means that you have to walk the walk.  Children most certainly learn more from our actions than they do by our words.  You must be the example to your child.

If your behavior is incongruent with the desired behavior, any lesson you teach is undermined.  You cannot teach kids to do as I say not as I do.  They will build norms and values based EXACTLY on what they SEE you do and do not.

We constantly must be mindful about everything we say and do in front of kids.  If I scream at a telemarketer and hang up on them, what lesson did I just teach my daughter?  If I become irate when someone cuts me off on the highway and yell obscenities at the other driver, what will my child learn.

Practice these five methods for building better manners and you will see your children’s manners blossom.

Help your child read and write better

Your Child’s Development

Is your child living up to his or her creative potential?

Do you feel like a tyrant who constantly berates his child for better grades?

Did your child fill all of your expectations until he or she started school?

Chances are that you fall somewhere in between any of those questions.

Don’t feel badly. Most of us think that pressuring our kids to do better
in school and strive for their academic excellence is part of our job
as parent.

Academic success IS important.

But neglecting creativity can put the brakes on a child’s creativity as well.

By nurturing creativity the rest of the elements will fall into place.

Easier said than done?

Well, we have just the tool for you. Find out more.

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Step by Step
By Marilyn Martyn

Read and Write eBook

The ebook provides the reader simple step-by-step strategies and techniques to assist your children
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and especially for you, the parent.   The book addresses the four important parts to improving
your child's reading skills: phonics, fluency, vocabulary knowledge and text comprehension.  

The learning lessons are: the sounds of letters and the combinations letters that represent them;
how to blend sounds into words; how to spell the words; how to recognize words; spelling patterns;
how to read sentences; the importance of practice passages; and the use of practice passages to
aid fluency.  Included in the introduction is the phonic checklist and an outline of the lessons
presented in the book.  This section focuses on the phonics.  There is a phonics check list
provided which contains, 18 vowel sounds, and15 consonant sounds.  The author breaks down
the basics of the English language and provides definitions for each component.

Lesson number 1 focuses on identifying the 26 letters of the English alphabet; what each letter
looks like in Upper Case and lower Case; and lists both the vowels and consonant letters.
There are three exercises provided in this lesson.

Lesson two focuses on the sounds each letter makes, first by looking at the vowel sounds and
then looking at the consonant sounds; the importance of blending sounds and the role syllables
play in words.  

The next lesson, four, provides a chart listing each of the 43 sounds for the English language.
Included in this lesson are instructions for four exercises.

Lesson four is dedicated to how sounds are spelled in words; lists the rules of English;
examples of short and long vowel sounds; how to recognize a dipthong and its importance;
the importance of vowel digraphs; consonant sounds and digraphs.

Lesson five is strictly pays attention to short vowel sounds.  There is a graph listing
the short vowel and the sound it makes.  The author again provides exercises,
suggests games such as the memory game to enhance the learning process.

Lesson six focuses on the sounds consonants make.  The author includes in this
section activities and picture representing the sounds.

The next lesson, number seven, focuses on making words with vowel and consonant sounds.
There are 7 steps provided with a list of how to blend sounds.

Lesson number eight is dedicated to words with short vowel sounds.
Again the author provides lists of words and how to pronounce them; points out the need
to learn sight words; two exercises; and four activities you can use.

Lesson nine looks at words with the CVC pattern.  The author defines what a CVC pattern is,
how to recognize it and its importance.  There is a list of words and sentences to review
and practice with along with two exercises.  

The next lesson, ten, looks at the sounds of "c" and "k" which often combined together
make the sound of  "k"; what is the rule; how to recognize and read this combination.
There is a list of contractions in this lesson with examples and an activity for you
to use to demonstrate the contractions.

Lesson eleven strictly focuses on consonant blends also know as cluster.
There is a list of beginning consonant blends; final consonant blends;
two exercises and two activities.

The twelfth lesson  is dedicated to reading and write these words with consonant blends.
There is a large list and two exercises for you to use.

Lesson 13, focuses on long vowel sounds.  There is a pictorial list for each sound
provided in this chapter; an important rule regarding when a word has the
vowel-consonant-final "e" pattern.  

Lesson fourteen looks at the different spellings for long vowel sounds;
provides a list of examples; looks at digraphs; and lists one exercise and one activity.

Lesson fifteen  is dedicated to vowel sounds spelled with two letters better known as digraphs.
There is a list of examples, exercises and activities. included in this lesson.  

Lesson sixteen is about when two vowels come together in the same word; what is the rule;
examples of words with this pattern; and three exercises.

Lesson seventeen  looks at other eight vowel sounds not yet covered in the text.
There is a example list and three exercises.

Next lesson, eighteen, is dedicated to  consonant sounds spelled with two letters,
better known as digraphs.  Again, there is a pictorial list of examples, exercises
and activities included.  

Lesson nineteen looks at the different spellings for each long vowel sound;
provides a list of examples.

Lesson twenty looks at common spellings of consonant digraphs and provides a
detailed list of examples. 

Lesson twenty-one is a reading practice activity.  

Lesson twenty-two focuses on syllables; how to recognize them; pronounce them;
the rules of spelling and pronunciation; and an exercise.  

Lesson twenty-three is a reading and writing practice activity with
several reading lessons.

Arm your child with the skills they need to succeed.
Help Your Child Read and Write Better!